So. I text a lot. Like, a lot. I could spend a bunch of time talking about why my texts are funnier than yours but that will make itself apparent within the first few posts I make on this blog.
ALL NAMES HAVE BEEN CHANGED TO PROTECT THE INNOCENT. I am not making any of these up; I just have really fucking weird friends. Librarians, philosophers, artsy advertisers, neurologists, writers and poets, eccentric university professors, you name it. And they all send me texts that border on, NAY, TOTALLY PASS utter absurdity.
Enjoy.
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